Dreaming with Lunesta

I have ADHD. Which sucks sometimes. Especially when it comes to trying to fall asleep when your mind won't shut its freakin' hole. But add to that the fact that I actually have a related sleep disorder, too. It's called Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome. Basically, my body's internal clock is off by several hours. What that means is that my mind and body want to sleep around midnight or later and then wake up around 10 or 11 a.m. I also sleep "backwards." Most people fall asleep quickly at night, sleep deeply, and then spend the early morning hours slowly waking up. I'm the opposite. So for example, if I try to go to bed around 10 p.m. I will toss and turn for hours and slowly fall asleep after a long time (if at all!). Then I do my deepest sleeping and dreaming in the morning, just before having to get up for work. You know that feeling of abruptly being woken from a very deep dream sleep? You know how sort of shocking that feels to your system and how groggy you feel and very irritable? That's how I feel every morning if my body doesn't get to sleep until its preferred time.

HOWEVER, for the last oh, 6 months or so, I've been taking Lunesta. Oh Lunesta, how I do love thee. It has been a miracle for me. I take it and in 30 minutes I'm out like Seacrest. I sleep really well and wake up like a semi-normal person the next morning. The interesting thing, though, is that I have the most bizarre, detailed dreams that feel supremely real.

So, submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society (does anyone else remember that?), I give you my latest Lunesta dreams...

I frequently dream that I am back in high school and that I've forgotten my locker combination (and also its location) and that I've not been going to class and I suddenly am in class having to take a big test, not knowing the material whatsoever. I had that dream but this time my classes were quite interesting. I went to Math class wherein, for some reason, we were reading and being tested on children's books. I can't remember any of the book titles. Then there was English class, being taught by a German woman but we were studying Spanish. She liked to make class fun by passing out multiple bottles of pink nail polish for the girls to paint their nails in class. Don't worry about the boys. There were none in this class, apparently. The instructor also made madeleines on some sort of panini maker thing during class for us to eat.

Suddenly there was a tornado. No warning. Just that the building was picked up and then hurled back to the earth. Immediately my classroom became one of those college stadium-type lecture halls where the chairs are affixed and in descending rows like a theatre. Folks were rushing around helping the wounded. I helped pull some people out of where they were stuck between the seats. Also, curiously, I helped some pit bulls in danger of falling (?) out of the seats. Then I went and found my brother, who was on the other side of the school. We had a happy and relieved reunion and then I began to rap.

Then I was magically on the beach in L.A. It was crazy crowded and instead of sunning themselves on the sand, folks were all perched atop multiple tiny stilted buildings, sort of like lifeguard towers. My mom was there and we started talking to a guy with a Scottish accent. He was wearing an Irish football club shirt, though. Mom was all, "Are you from Ireland?" and I was all, "MOM! Can't you hear his accent? He's Scottish!" and then he and I had a good laugh at my mom's expense with high fives all around for good measure.

The End.

Por fin, I would like to say that Lunesta has been a God-send. Now, if I can just get rid of that damn green glowing butterfly that hovers around my night table...

Vote for Me at Humor Blogs!

Don't like your name? Get a new one.

I came across this Lucha Libre (Mexican Wrestler) name generator and thought it'd be fun to post for April Fools. Click on the link and then come back and leave a comment with your new name!

Lucha Libre Nombre Nuevo

Mine is "El Toro de Oro."

The gangsta one can be entertaining, too:

Gangsta Name Generator

I'm "Heavy Red Snappa." Shoo.

This is why I need to hire a dog-walker...

And now, let us all pause for a moment of silence, to mourn the tragic and sudden death of Froggy. I came home tonight to find that he had... wait for it... *croaked* after being lobotomized by Snuggles. Poor Froggy. He was a gentleman of a frog. Perhaps a bit (ahem) *stuffy* at times, yes. But he lived a good life, albeit short.

Witness, if you can stomach it, the carnage...

Yahweh be praised, Sheepy was mercifully unharmed in the bloodbath. Although, for quite some time now he has been mysteriously missing both ears. I like to refer to him by his Spanish nom de plume, "La Oveja Sin Orejas," just cuz it sounds so poetic and rhyme-y and stuff.

Methinks it's time to hire a dog-walker to come and take the Burgle-Bean for a long walk on the days that I have class. Ya think?

Rachele and Snuggles Sittin' in a Tree...

Those who know me well know I lost my heart in Perú last summer on a mission trip. I brought home a new outlook on life, unforgettable experiences and lifelong friends. My best friend from Lima, Rachele, came to visit a couple weeks ago. She stayed in my ridiculous pink guest room and we had the best time.

Rach

(A.K.A. Rachele Alesandra Franchini Cueva)

Here we are, sitting on the giant shoe at City Bites. You know... the giant shoe that has a sign on it that basically says, "Don't Sit on the Giant Shoe!" Not to worry, the guy working there said it was okay. Probably because Rachele was hot and had a cute accent. :o) Just guessing. BTW, the only thing cooler than regular-sized Chuck Taylors is a giant Chuck. And the only thing cooler than a giant Chuck is a giant Peanut Butter Swirl cookie from City Bites. But only because it can be eaten and a giant Chuck cannot. Well, I suppose it could but, um... ew.

Peruvians are some of the most loving and genuinely dear people I've ever had the pleasure of being around. While Rachele is like a sister to me, I have not yet been able to meet her family. Still, they sent with her the most lovely gifts for our family. I can't wait to meet them in person because I already love them. If you want to learn the true meaning of AGAPE love (I've got that on the brain since it was the topic of yesterday's sermon), go to Perú. What I see in Rachele and the other peruanos I met last summer is what Jesus talks about when He says to come to Him like a little child. In these precious, precious people I see such a childlike wonder and innocence. It's almost too hard to describe what I mean by that. But those who got to meet Rach while she was here--my family--and friends, can attest to it.

At the Melting Pot

One really cool thing that I got to witness while Rach was here was her warming to Snuggles. If you can even believe it, "pit bulls" have an even worse reputation in Perú than they do in the U.S. Hard to imagine, I know. When Rach first arrived I'm pretty sure she was scared of Snuggles. I could see it in her body language. He would jump up to greet her (I know - I'm still working on that with him) and she would go completely rigid, turn away and sort duck away from him. And when I told her he was a pit bull, she was astonished. And a little freaked out, I think. She said, "I can't wait to tell all my friends at home that I was around an actual pit bull!" When she told a friend at home that she was staying with a pit bull, he said, "I'm scared! He's gonna eat me!" I hated that Rachele was nervous around Snugs and I was hoping against hope that he could prove himself to her and show her what "pit bulls" are really like.

Well, I got my wish and Snuggles got a new BFF! By the end of the week, Snuggles was cuddling up next to or on top off Rach all the time. She got a cold while she was visiting and napped a lot on the couch. She told me that Snuggles could tell she didn't feel well and that he laid down with her and took care of her while I was at work. He even started to obey her commands in Spanish! It was adorable.

Here are some pictures of my best buddies, shortly before Rachele's departure from OKC.

The night before Rachele's flight was to take off for Lima, I was hanging out in her room while she packed her things. It was then that I witnessed the most precious, adorable, REDONK thing ever! Snuggles brought in his squeaky bone. He gently placed it into her suitcase. He nosed it into the middle and left it there. He left the room. He came back with his sheep. He put his sheep in the suitcase. He left and returned again, this time with his froggy. He put the froggy in the suitcase. One at a time, he brought in his favorite toys and left them in Rachele's suitcase. I was just in awe of the whole thing. I regret so much not getting it on video! But I was just so caught up watching him play out this cute little drama that I didn't even think of it until he was finished.

Mr. Pouty McPouterson

The day Rachele got home she sent me an email asking me to tell everyone how much she enjoyed the visit, how much she loves them all and how much she will miss them. Then she specifically asked me to give many "besos y cariños" to Snuggles (love and kisses). She said she missed him so much she wanted to cry. She has posted her pictures with him on her Facebook saying how she loves him and misses him so very much and talks about how he is the most caring and loving pit bull in all of existence!

I can't say I'm surprised Mr. WigglyPants won yet another person over.

I had a friend mention this weekend, "Hey, did you know that some people want to like, ban pit bulls or something? Like, they want to pass laws against them and stuff. Crazy, huh?"

Yep... yep, it is...

P.D. A mi hermanita, Rachele... muchos besitos y abrazos de Snuggles y de mí. Te extraño muchísimo, Sis.