Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Another New Blog


Okay, so disclaimer: I never thought I'd be one of those people with 23 different blogs.

Disclaimer over. I have another new blog! Check out The Clothing Swap Blog. My fashionably fabulous friend Moi over at Bite the Apple suggested the idea and we figured, hey, what the heck. Why not do it together?


It's a great place to score fun FREE items like this pair of vintage rhinestone cat-eye glasses:




Or these peep-toe leopard shoes:




So hop on over... check it out! And rummage through your closets at home for some gems that might need a new home.

Monday, May 4, 2009

Mute Monday: Places Revealed


Here are the answers. Because inquiring minds want to know.




Destin, Florida

(A.K.A. my family's vacation destination every year and in a couple weeks!)









Black Hills, South Dakota

(A little "burrito" walked up to our Jeep on the side of the road and said hi. I freaking WANT one.)









Kauai, Hawaii

(There are feral chickens ALL OVER the island; some with the most beautiful, bright colors)








Natural Waterfall ~ Kauai, Hawaii

(We got to swim and cliff-dive --only Jake took the plunge; I swam -- at the waterfall where the beginning of the first Indiana Jones movie was filmed. We also saw the cave where that big-ass rock came rolling out after Indy.)







Kauai, Hawaii

(Mom and I horseback riding on the beach. ABsolutely incredible experience.)

Check out the new blog!

I have a new blog along with some of my funniest and favoritest blogger friends. Julia D. from Homemade Hilarity (credit is due her for coming up with the idea), Shawn from The Shark Tank, Brooke from Brooke Amanda, and I (from HERE!) have decided to post all of our Open Letters to a new joint blog, The Open Letters Blog. So go check it out! Don't delay! This offer won't last long! Operators are standing by!


But wait! If you act now you will also get a free tube of Mighty Mend-It and a lifetime supply of Sham-Wows!

My newest Open Letter, "An Open Letter to Rod Stewart" is there.

Don't miss out on the funny from some seriously funny people.

An Open Letter to Rod Stewart


An Open Letter to Rod Stewart


Dear Mr. Stewart:

No, I do not want your body, nor do I think you are sexy. I’m just letting you know.

Thanks for your inquiry,

Heather

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Mute Monday Topic: "Guess the Place(s)"





















Saturday, May 2, 2009

Coming up, on Mystery Science Theater 3000...

The Attack... of the Disembodied Hair!!!





Ooo, creepy...


Here it comes! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!





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Friday, May 1, 2009

What I'm NOT Buying this Weekend: Mod Cloth Edition






Go visit Margo if you want to participate next weekend!




Almost all items in this post are from Mod Cloth.




First off, I'm certainly not buying either of these adorable swimsuits.





OR this cute umba-rella-ella-ella to sit under.





And I'm soooooooooo not buying the next few ridiculously adorable little numbers.

I will simply look too fabulous not wearing them.


Urban Garden Dress


Complete with lucite coral earrings, antiqued gold rose ring and First Lady peep-toes.

Amount saved: $212





Curves Ahead Dress



With faceted onyx studs, Film Noir purse, Dita stockings, and
Little Bow Peep Toes.

Amount saved: $244






Good Ship Lollipop Dress


With vintage bakelite button earrings, red bow bangle, vintage box bag, and Red Hot Chili Peep Toes.

Amount Saved: $166






Dawn Iris Dress


With gold disc necklace and earrings and Thistle Pumps.

Amount saved: $96





Wishing on a Star Dress


With vintage teal and gold button earrings, black pucker clutch and Splish Splash T-Straps.

Amount saved: $258



Total saved this weekend
(along with the 2 cute suits and umba-rella): $1,331




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[SNUGGLES] How to Make a Pit Bull Roll His Eyes

Dis is for Nooter, who requested dat I come out to play. Here I comes, world!


My award-winning foto essay:
How to Make a Pit Bull Roll His Eyes












Srsly, what is my mom thinkeen? *RME* <--(roll my eyes)


I had to get on I Has a Hotdog and express my feeleens about dis:




On an unrelated note, look how leetle I can roll myself up! I can be like a tiny little ball of cuteness.

I Heart Legos

I have been thinking lately that I might like to drive a Honda Element. Did you know that the interior is waterproof so you can powerwash the inside?! And riding in it feels like you’re inside a roomy spaceship. And they have this cool tent thing that you can attach to the back end and go camping! OMG!




An Element does resemble a Lego car, though, and sadly, I don't look like this:



And I think it might be a requirement to have hands shaped like little C’s in order to grip the steering wheel. Also, your feet have to have little square-shaped holes in them.











I really do want one, though.

Any of you out there have one and wanna tell me how you like driving it?






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Thursday, April 30, 2009

Dreaming with Lunesta

I have ADHD. Which sucks sometimes. Especially when it comes to trying to fall asleep when your mind won't shut its freakin' hole. But add to that the fact that I actually have a related sleep disorder, too. It's called Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome. Basically, my body's internal clock is off by several hours. What that means is that my mind and body want to sleep around midnight or later and then wake up around 10 or 11 a.m. I also sleep "backwards." Most people fall asleep quickly at night, sleep deeply, and then spend the early morning hours slowly waking up. I'm the opposite. So for example, if I try to go to bed around 10 p.m. I will toss and turn for hours and slowly fall asleep after a long time (if at all!). Then I do my deepest sleeping and dreaming in the morning, just before having to get up for work. You know that feeling of abruptly being woken from a very deep dream sleep? You know how sort of shocking that feels to your system and how groggy you feel and very irritable? That's how I feel every morning if my body doesn't get to sleep until its preferred time.

HOWEVER, for the last oh, 6 months or so, I've been taking Lunesta. Oh Lunesta, how I do love thee. It has been a miracle for me. I take it and in 30 minutes I'm out like Seacrest. I sleep really well and wake up like a semi-normal person the next morning. The interesting thing, though, is that I have the most bizarre, detailed dreams that feel supremely real.

So, submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society (does anyone else remember that?), I give you my latest Lunesta dreams...

I frequently dream that I am back in high school and that I've forgotten my locker combination (and also its location) and that I've not been going to class and I suddenly am in class having to take a big test, not knowing the material whatsoever. I had that dream but this time my classes were quite interesting. I went to Math class wherein, for some reason, we were reading and being tested on children's books. I can't remember any of the book titles. Then there was English class, being taught by a German woman but we were studying Spanish. She liked to make class fun by passing out multiple bottles of pink nail polish for the girls to paint their nails in class. Don't worry about the boys. There were none in this class, apparently. The instructor also made madeleines on some sort of panini maker thing during class for us to eat.

Suddenly there was a tornado. No warning. Just that the building was picked up and then hurled back to the earth. Immediately my classroom became one of those college stadium-type lecture halls where the chairs are affixed and in descending rows like a theatre. Folks were rushing around helping the wounded. I helped pull some people out of where they were stuck between the seats. Also, curiously, I helped some pit bulls in danger of falling (?) out of the seats. Then I went and found my brother, who was on the other side of the school. We had a happy and relieved reunion and then I began to rap.

Then I was magically on the beach in L.A. It was crazy crowded and instead of sunning themselves on the sand, folks were all perched atop multiple tiny stilted buildings, sort of like lifeguard towers. My mom was there and we started talking to a guy with a Scottish accent. He was wearing an Irish football club shirt, though. Mom was all, "Are you from Ireland?" and I was all, "MOM! Can't you hear his accent? He's Scottish!" and then he and I had a good laugh at my mom's expense with high fives all around for good measure.

The End.


Por fin, I would like to say that Lunesta has been a God-send. Now, if I can just get rid of that damn green glowing butterfly that hovers around my night table...







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