Thursday, May 21, 2009

An Open Letter to the Doctor in the House

An Open Letter to the Doctor in the House


Dear Doc:

I have been eating these mini-bags of buttered popcorn from a box at the back of my pantry for weeks now. I just now saw that the bags are imprinted with the following: "Best by February 2009."

Am I going to die?

Eagerly awaiting your reply,

Heather

9 comments:

TROLL Y2K said...

I'm not an MD, I'm a food scientist. As time passes, the oils will lose their ability to heat the kernels evenly.

This will result in an inconsistent level of cooking with some kernels unpopped and some burnt.

It's also greatly increases the chance that the paper packaging will catch fire.

If you touch the bags, you'll probably feel a clump right in the center of the package. Breaking it up will improve the chances that you'll get near full evem cooking and an enjoyable popcorn experience.

Corrine said...

Well, there!
Your gonna live!

obladi oblada said...

Wow Troll, that was very informative. HC: Please be a little more careful in the future...

David said...

Aside from that scientific blather blah blah blah...

They put the date there for a reason. Now your decision must focus on: did they fudge the date to get you to eat it sooner than necessary so you would come back and buy more or is the date exact and the popcorn has now developed latent salmonella and e.coli ?

I hope you choose wisely grasshopper.

Eric said...

You do always cook your popcorn Medium Well, right? No worries...

Margo said...

what's with the expiry dates being put on all these foodstuffs that previously were supposed to last for 15 years or LONGER? Unless a can, or bag, or box is moldy, or bulging with botulism, you'll be fine :) But I for one, per TROLL's advice, am going to break up any chunks I can find in the microwave popcorn bags.

Nan-Nan said...

"EVEM cooking".... I am SO glud sombodu elsr oit therw typos like I di!

FreakSmack said...

I'm not a doctor, but I do play one on television. You should induce vommiting immediately, or wait maybe it's drink a glass of milk. Either way nobody eat the brown popcorn, I repeat, the brown popcorn is bad.

Heather Cherry said...

Troll: Holy moly! Thanks!

Corrine: Whew!

O/O: I'm trying...

David: Eek!

Eric: Well, I do like a little pink in the middle...

Margo: Scary...

Mom: Yeha.

Freak: What if it's covered in chocolate?